Washed Weekly: Swipe For a Surprise
Add me on the grom.
Welcome to Washed Weekly — a weekly newsletter that will feature original columns, quick reads, exclusive product drops, and an offering of some of the best content we’ve created throughout the week that was. Read it, enjoy it, and pass it on to anyone you think will enjoy it, too. You can also check out the Washed network of podcasts.
Washed Media’s 2026 New Year’s Resolutions
Since this is the final newsletter of 2025, it’s a good time to talk about the next year as it relates to Washed Media. This was a good year for Washed. A fine year. We launched a live show four days a week, and I think the new format big time fucks.
I’m not sure what our 2025 resolutions would have been had we made them, but I’m pretty sure we wouldn’t have hit all of them. Some, but not all. Let’s look ahead to 2026.
1. Another Meet-Up
This year seemed to kind of fly by for me. The New York meet-up doesn’t feel too far in the rearview mirror, but it was definitely over a year ago, and we haven’t had one since. That means zero meet-ups in 2025, and that is unacceptable. They’re always a blast and we love meeting listeners. New York was an absolute blast, thanks to all who showed up. We just sort of let the year go by without attempting to plan one. Not good.
Nashville, Denver, Seattle, San Diego, Atlanta, Madison, Charlotte, Dallas – all, and others, are in play.
2. A Hire
We’ve known for a while that hiring someone to ramp up our socials and help Randy with producing has needed to happen at some point. This next year could be the one.
3. New Patreon Offering(s)
Patreon subscribers are among the most important metrics that define this company’s success. If a show has gone stale, it needs to be replaced. Keeping the content beyond the paywall fresh and strong is always a huge priority for us, and we’re already in talks of shaking it up a bit. Or a lot. Who knows?
4. Getting Randy’s Game Show Off the Ground
I don’t know the status of ‘Do You Know It? – A Game Show by Randy Trembacki,’ but I’m on pins and needles over here to see what he’s cooking up, because you know he’s cooking something up. Do I miss doing the show once a month even though the music portion brought me consistent embarrassment? Yeah, I do. It’s a great product. I need it back in some way, shape, or form.
5. Consistent Air Conditioning
Our air conditioner SUCKS. It SUCKS. We paid a few grand a year and half ago to replace the entire unit because the old one SUCKED, too. The new one sucks almost as much, repeatedly breaking down during the hottest days of the year. I’m not going to sit here and pretend like podcasting is grueling work, but podcasting in a sweat box is a serious challenge.
6. A Christmas Dinner
We didn’t plan a company Christmas dinner this year. Shameful stuff. You get the boys in the Carve private room with a $500 minimum balance to hit, and that’s the shit dreams are made of. You put Randy in front of an overpriced menu with numerous sugary cocktails on it, and it’s going to be a good time. Why we didn’t do it this year, I have no idea. There have been talks of doing one in early January to kick the year off. Don’t want it. NEED it.
7. Celebrating Our Successes
I’m a fan of celebrating the successes in life, even the small ones. This certainly should apply to work, too. It’s good for morale. It’s fun. It grows the economy. Benefits everybody. Hurts nobody. It wouldn’t hurt to inject a little more fun into this place. Our jobs are already fun. Let’s celebrate the good shit we accomplish along the way while we’re at it.
8. Sunday Scaries Milly Party
See above. Don’t look now, but my dawg is closing in on a milly on the grom. Big boy numbers. A major milestone. If we don’t throw down for this, what are we even doing?
Stone Creek Coffee
It’s gift-giving season, and we need to talk: stop giving people stuff they don’t want. Novelty socks and random tchotchkes go straight to the landfill. Gift cards feel like you forgot until the parking lot. If you want to give something people will actually enjoy every single day, go with Stone Creek Coffee. Roasted in Milwaukee, sourced responsibly, and offered in blends and single-origin microlots that make mornings better. Grab a holiday gift box or set someone up with a subscription, they’ll thank you later.
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The Only Christmas Playlist You Need
by Will deFries
Welcome, friends. And Merry Christmas to you as well. Being that this will likely be the final newsletter of the year for Washed Weekly, I wanted to send everyone off with my Pistachios playlist on Spotify — something your parents will love around the house, trust me.
When I was little, we’d go to my great aunt’s house for Christmas Eve. I’m not sure if she was actually my great aunt or not, but I remember it feeling stereotypically Christmas-y whenever we walked in. A fire going in the fireplace, a side den where all the cousins hung out, and a bowl of pistachios that I would absolutely hammer until I got sick.
Ever since, I’ve always associated pistachios with Christmas and the feeling of Christmas Eve.
One year, I remember my cousin receiving a CD — “The Score” by The Fugees from 1996. I thought it was dope but there was no way he was going to let me touch it or listen to it. We started playing “Hot Potato” in the aforementioned kids den when suddenly I had my head pinned down in the couch for even looking at The Fugees album. Aren’t Christmas memories beautiful?
If you’re already familiar with this particular playlist, you may notice I’ve removed several songs after last year. While I’d like to claim they “didn’t fit the vibe,” I actually think I accidentally put an entire Christmas album on the playlist that didn’t belong there in the first place.
If this makes it on the speakers at your house, your parents’ house, or anywhere else in between, thank you for letting me be part of your Christmas season.
My Best of the Best New IG Follows
by Dave
I did enough ‘grammin this year to put social media manager on my LinkedIn. I tossed out tens of thousands of likes, and because I’m team followback, I followed back. We had a great year. I’m always on the lookout for linkers, builders, founders, and creators who can provide me with a nice little dopamine hit a few times each hour. Here are a few standouts from my official proprietary 2025 new follows list.
Steel Pan Guy
2025 was the year I learned what Big Teflon didn’t want me to know: The steel pan is a superior kitchen item. Steel Pan Guy influenced so hard I bought a damn steel pan and now cook with it almost exclusively. When I started following, I was mainly looking for a new Italian dish to make on the weekends. A new take on Bolognese, an easy sauce, or a quick three-ingredient pasta for when my house has devolved into bedlam. But before long, he was dropping knowledge on steel pan eggs, steaks, and easy pan cleaning methods. Tomato paste is an effective steel pan cleaner. Did you know that? I didn’t. Fuckin’ Big Teflon.
I’ve had some failures, including an attempt at chicken thighs that I don’t think I’ve spoken about publicly, but I’m a steel pan believer.
Wrangler Bruce
There was a two-week stretch in 2025 where I was served this guy’s videos daily by the algorithm. He’s the Snake Wrangler. If you’re out round SoCal way and find a venomous snake in the rock garden, Wrangler Bruce should be your first call. I have friends who have a visceral reaction to anything snake related. I’m indifferent. I certainly don’t want to encounter a snake, but I do find their whole vibe fascinating. Dudes are just out her slitherin’. Bruce not only pulls up with all the skill required to calmly and safely remove a rattlesnake, but he drops snake knowledge that layman like me might not otherwise know. Then he gently places them in a bucket, has some lighthearted banter with the homeowner, and relocates them. Where? I have no idea. Maybe the Snake Farm. It’s a reptile house.
Peyton Ruddy
2025 also saw me take my first trip to Austin’s own Comedy Mothership on a random Tuesday evening. Believe it or not, I wasn’t up there working on new material for the upcoming Netflix special, “Dave Does Alien Voice for 45 minutes.” No, I was just a patron for their Bottom of the Barrell night. The standout of the evening was Peyton Ruddy. Good bits! I’d tell you about them but Mothership security would drone strike my home. Also, I just don’t remember. All I know is he stood out, so I followed him on the ‘gram. Good follow.
Me
You know I had to do it to ‘em. Add me on The Gram.
Chips and Skate
When the algo presents you with a little Sicilian kid who skates 10x better than anyone you grew up with, you follow him. I made the mistake of letting my son watch like 10 different videos of his, and now all he can talk about is getting a board. While that makes me tear up a bit out of both pride and fear, it also makes me bullish on the future of this country.
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Will’s Christmas Playlist isn’t as good as his Fall One (Fall Pack) but it is very solid.