Mailbag: Wedding Vows, Longterm Gifts, & Career Changes

Helping a player out.

Welcome to Dillon Cheverere’s Mailbag. Send questions to dillon@washedmedia.com. All topics are on the table. Read it, enjoy it, and pass it on to anyone you think will enjoy it, too. You can also check out the Washed network of podcasts.

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1. Hey Dillon,

I, too, have a son (2) and have considered buying him a gift now for his 18th birthday. I'm leaning towards a watch. Have you thought of something similar for Parks?  Is this a ridiculous idea?

Thanks,

Tanner out Lakeway way

I think this is a really cool idea, but I might need help in understanding the reasoning behind buying him something now and holding onto it for 16 years before giving it to him. Is it so when you do finally gift it to him, you can point to it being the same age as him? Does that make it extra special? Maybe it does.

Would you wear it in the meantime? Would it sit in a safe somewhere all those years? I would think it would be so difficult to hang onto that thing for so long without showing it to him or giving it to him.

A watch is a killer gift idea, though. A quality one that will last forever. If you decide to do this, you can’t go wrong with a nice watch. I think you should wear it in the meantime, however. 

2. Dorn,

Need some help and figured I'd leave it up to one of the experts. I'm 29 years old and making my triumphant return to NOLA for the first time since getting food poisoning from Bourbon St oysters at the ripe age of 22. It's one of our best friends' bachelor trips and we want to do the city right this time. What're some "must-do's"? Lot of chatter from you boys around Galatoire's and Lafitte's but what are some non-negotiables for the fellas? -Patrick

Our experience at Galatoire’s was quite possibly the most fun dining experience I’ve ever had at a restaurant. Ever. It’s mandatory that men wear coats, which I think is sick. It’s a four to five hour event with heavy, fried foods and good drinks. If you can swing it, I can’t recommend it enough. Just typing this out gets me excited. 

Lafitte’s Blacksmith Shop is also a must. It’s not the kind of place you need to spend hours in, but it should be a mandatory stop for any guys’ trip. It claims to be the oldest bar in the U.S. and they serve purple frozen drinks. It’s just cool, and the vibe is very fun. 

Another rec I’ll throw at you is the Carousel Bar inside Hotel Monteleone. It’ll be impossible for all of you to find seats at the bar, but it’s worth swinging through to catch the vibe. Very cool place. 

Dave raves about The Bulldog. One of his favorite bars in any city.

3. Having a baby in September. The wife and I are considering a babymoon, not 100% on where to go or what to do. (With hot tubs and spas kinda being off the table) Have any recs? Did you or the boys do anything pre becoming a daddy? -Morgen

Parks’ mother and I went to Lost Pines resort in Bastrop for our babymoon. It was exactly like you described. We hit the spa and got massages and facials and had nice meals and sat by the fire. Shit like that. It was a good time. 

Spoil your queen because she’s doing literally all of the heavy lifting when that baby is ready to see the world. 

4. First time long time. I'm getting married Saturday & have been told by my future-wife that we are writing our own vows. Have you done this before? Maybe I've never listened to this part of the wedding before but I'm not sure what to say here. Any tips?

Also, feeling nervous about the event overall but not sure why. How did you feel going into wedding week?

Keep doing your thing #GOGS -Alec from Bham

Yes, I’ve done this before. Something to keep in mind is that people don’t really pay too close attention to your vows during the ceremony. They’ve all been to a hundred weddings and they’re all the same. They’re just thinking about which hors d'oeuvres you chose for cocktail hour and what their first drink order is going to be. 

So, write your vows as if she is the only person in the world who’s going to hear them. Make it personal and sweet. A touch of humor is okay but it’s not a stand-up comedy routine so move on from the joke quickly and close with a strong, sentimental message. 

And yeah, dude, I was very nervous. You’re supposed to be nervous. Embrace it.

5. Hey Dillon,

Longtime toucher/day one backer here.

I'd like to know if you have any advice for somebody looking to totally change careers. I've been with my company for over 5 years (I'm 28) and things are getting pretty stale. I work in a pretty niche and volatile industry and I'm afraid my skills don't fully translate to other more common industries. I'm just so bored at work and feel like I don't have the drive that I used to when I started here.

I have no idea where to really start. I've been applying to a bunch of jobs with a similar salary, both in my current industry and new ones, and not even a nibble. 

If you could help a player out, that would be much appreciated.

Note: He shared the industry in which he works but asked me to keep it to myself. 

The good news for you is you’re plenty young to reinvent yourself professionally. I’d say the same thing if you were 5-10 years older, too. You have so much time to figure out what it is you’re more passionate about and go for it. 

The bad news is the job market right now is tough in a few industries, as it seems like you’re already realizing on your own. There’s a balance of finding something you enjoy doing that compensates you well enough to make the leap. You need to decide where that sweet spot lies for you.  

Some well-known advice on switching jobs is to look around while you’re still employed, and not after. That’s a risky endeavor. 

6. a. What’s something you only do when you’re extremely bored?

b. What’s the worst purchase you’ve ever made? 

c. Mental Health check? -Alexandra

1. The only thing I really do when I get bored is something I’m not proud of. So many times I’ve caught myself subconsciously reaching for my phone to scroll social media. It’s a bad habit that I know so many of us are guilty of, and I am no better. Instagram Reels will absolutely suck me in.

2. An engagement ring.

3. Not the best.

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